Any truth to the rumors that you are at a call center in India, and type replies wearing a puppet? We would like a picture of you wearing nothing but pasties to confirm you are indeed a real person.
Did the name of the company come from aliens? Mars tar.
I ordered a bag of stripper clips in 2006 and haven't used them, and now they look rusty. Can I exchange them for something I saw on Questar's site?
Could you make the website look more like facebook? That way people will give you more likes, and share pictures of their ugly children on it.
I think instead of bold print, like Johnone, you should use the smallest font size possible. Nobody reads and comprehends the replies anyway, and they would take up less space. That would let us squabble without the annoying use of logic. In fact, you should only write in verbs and nouns, no other words. "Sent gun ordered packaged replied credit card charged kiss @ss."
The pictures on your site should include the ability to zoom on a microscope level, on each actual product, not an example. That way no-one complains that theirs looks different. Include descriptions of how things smell. "Rifling strong, but slightly musty, with a hint of oak. Stock smells like socks."
Include notifications of the shipping and packaging process: "9:45am EST. Two layers of small bubble wrap placed on bayonet, secured with clear tape. Bayonet placed in dual layer carton of cardboard, made from 70% recycled material. Inner flaps folded. 9:46am EST. Two layers of clear packing tape applied to lips of carton, using red tape gun. *note* Slight malfunction of tape gun led to uneven tear. 9:47am EST. Carton placed on bottom shelf of package cart next to three packages. Slight stain on cart shelf, back wheel squeeks." Have this texted to buyers as it happens.
Could you guys include a free cleaning service for guns you sell? I am willing to pay shipping one way, if you will air back overnight.