If the OP has "bad wrists", although a 1911 in 9mm would have fairly soft recoil, the weight of the gun may be an issue.
The H&K suggestion is good, the gun is fairly light, I own several H&K's and they have softer recoil when compared to my other pistols in the same caliber.
However, I recently shoot a Glock 24C in S&W .40. The gun was lightweight and it recoiled less than any of my 9mm pistols!
I would suggest the OP consider a Glock in 9mm with a compensated barrel.
I recently purchased a lightly used G35 which I will shoot in .40 for a while, but plan to purchase a .40 to 9 mm barrel with comp. ports, as I'm sure it will recoil like a .22.