Yea. f**k Miller! I hope he never sees my 22lr basement range
This spring after my garbage was ripped apart yet again i came to realize that these little buggers are ruining EVERYTHING around my house including my veggie and herb gardens! (The cooking kind of herbs)
I decided that enough is enough. I’m sure I’d get in trouble if I told you how the first one met his end (Let's say softball wasn't his sport) but I’m sure it was natural causes. It was acting strange and followed me around the back yard so I figured it was either drunk on fermented veggies or had rabies. It had to go right then and there.
Anyway I decided to trap the rest and move them far away and let em go. (the neighbors pool will be far enough me thinks)
So my first attempt they simply batted the cage over, the door slamming shut and the food falling out. So I decided to use a 10” screw bit to fit all the way through the cage and screw the cage to the deck with washers so they couldn’t move it. Easy
They just pawed the food outa the side of the cage not seeing the door was open and triggering the release.
So now I’m f**kin pissed so I screwed 2 boards to the bloody thing so the only visible cage parts were the top and the door. Now i got em fo shizzle right???
SOOOO This is what I woke up to
So now the damn cage is screwed to the deck 10 times over and there's boards screwed to that as well!! I have a video of me letting it out with 5 garbage bags taped to me with holes cut out for eyes

I somehow didn't get sprayed

So i f**kin gave up!! Now instead of putting food scraps in the garbage i just either flush em or leave em in a fancy bowl for em outside with some coolant to wash it down with.. Racoons like coolant right??