im a Ruger fan, IMO out of all of the big gun manufaturers out at the moment they make the most robust and reliable action, and have the best fit and finish. it costs the same as a remington 700 and there is no comparison... i have several remmy 700s and nothing against the company, but a recent production 700 looks like a POS next to a ruger.
their M77 mark 2 compact is an excellent ladies/youth gun - its very handy, light, and dont be afraid of the short barrel. people think that out of a 16" barrel the muzzle flash and noise would be brutal, but its really no different than shooting any other length barrel. in fact because the barrel is so short it is very stiff and accurate: you lose a couple hundred FPS due to the shortened barrel length but mine in .308 is capable of .75 MOA with cheap ammo.
my wife is tiny, and the gun fits her better than anything else i have in the safe with no modification, but its not small enough that i cant use it. its also her 'favorite' gun in terms of aesthetics - every new gun i buy she says 'the ruger is still my favorite', hehe. it has a decent recoil pad from the factory but you could take it one step further and replace it with an aftermarket recoil reducer.
the problem is that it doesnt fit your criteria of 'good iron sights'. i would pick up a compact or - even better - a frontier, and mount a red dot/holo sight on it. with a red dot out front on the frontier model its a very accurate, handy and fast-tracking gun thats attractive, reliable and can take a beating. IMO get a stainless one so its less maintenance for her, in 7mm-08 or .308. .308 certainly fits the cheap ammo criteria.