Mike, you have been fed a lot of information by people that don't know what they're talking about.
As far as military primers go, the military does specify primers that are harder than most civilian component primers. Not impossible to get. More than likely, he is using Bench Rest Primers.
As for military powders, that has been explained and there is an outlet in Hawksbury Ontario that supplies them, same goes for pulled bullets, when they have them. Hornady also sells the 165gr fmj bullets. Good 165 gr bullets are available from all of the commercial makers.
As for his scale being so accurate that it throws out bullets with a 2 grain difference, his scale isn't very accurate. two tenths of a grain difference is the minimum weight difference most serious target shooters will tolerate.
As for military powder, powders with IMR prefixes are called IMPROVED MILITARY POWDERS. Powders like H4831 are also ex military spec powder, along with several others.
Lots of other things your buds and maybe the sniper told you were either rubbing in a rookie or you misunderstood their meaning.
As for military sniper rounds, there is no reason at all why a sniper wouldn't reload for his personally owned and purchased private firearms. As for his issued rifle, the rounds may be handloaded by a special company or loaded to very crucial specs in special runs. Unless he's sneaking them in to use on the military ranges, that isn't likely to happen.
Another thing, as far as I know, unless it's a special purpose rifle, his military issue rifle would be chambered in 7.62x51 Nato (308 Winchester) rather than the 30-06 you referred to.
The quarter inch plate you refer to might be a ceramic armor plate or it might be a chrome carbide plate. I use a chrome carbide plate as a target backing. I use it for two reasons, one, when it's mounted at a forward angle it deflects the bullets down, two, it also causes the bullets to badly deform or break up. I have shot several thousand rounds onto this plate and it doesn't even show a dent. Mind you, it's a half inch thick. One quarter inch of chrome carbide welded into a soft iron backing underwater, until the whole thickness is 1/2 in. Extremely tough as well as wear and impact resistant.