Mother knows best?

7mm-08

7mm-08

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Selkirk,Manitoba
Wow where to start?My 12 year old daughter had taken up the interest in deer hunting this spring,so much so that she was studying her sister's (243)
hunter safety manual.Well about a month ago she did a total 360 degree turn
around.She use to love to go target shooting and was really interested in deer hunting,to the point where she was going to show me up this season:p .
My mother is totally turned off by woman going out hunting and believes a womans place is at home.She tried to discourage both my wife and oldest daughter from hunting when they became interested in it.I think she is working extra hard on my youngest as my youngest is afraid to come out of the car fearing she might get shot while we are target shooting and let me tell you,safety is a #1 priority when I am hunting or shooting.My daughter was so gung-ho about writing her test Sept.9 and joining her family hunting including my dad.I know right now approaching my mom with this is a waste of breath and time as she claims to always be right,and I am not about to stop my daughter from visiting her grandparents.My oldest daughter barely visits anymore because of my mothers negativity towards guns and hunting.
I myself am not the kind of parent to force anyone to do something against thier wishes and if any of my family did not want to hunt/shoot I would respect that.What burns me is that my mom always tells everyone that I force my family out to the shooting range/hunting/scouting for deer when 90% of the time it is them asking me to take them.I told my youngest it is totally up to you,and I will buy you the proper rifle,clothing ect.What are your takes on this should I just let sleeping dogs lie or try to get my daughter
interested in hunting again.Please let me know your opinions.Thanks.
 
I think you should talk to your mother and tell her that you'll raise your kids however you want and that if she doesnt stop telling them lies or whatever it is shes doing that the kids will not be coming over to visit anymore. I know it's hard but sometimes you have to put your foot down and be tough even with people you love. the longer you let things just boil under your skin the worse off you and the rest of your family will be. But be prepared to follow though with the threat (not seeing kids anymore) if she decides to continue. If it bothers you that much then you need to take a stand on it, even if she is your mother. at the very least talk to your father and see if he'll talk to her if you don't wanna confront our mother, but you confronting her would be the best idea.

good luck.
 
....x1

My wife and I had to do this with a family member and it works. Painful for those involved, but it will be even more painful if nothing is said.

Good Luck!
 
i would try to ride it out give your daughter a bit of space. in her own time she will decide. as for ole mom she will not change her ways
 
Chopperhead said:
I think you should talk to your mother and tell her that you'll raise your kids however you want and that if she doesnt stop telling them lies or whatever it is shes doing that the kids will not be coming over to visit anymore. I know it's hard but sometimes you have to put your foot down and be tough even with people you love. the longer you let things just boil under your skin the worse off you and the rest of your family will be. But be prepared to follow though with the threat (not seeing kids anymore) if she decides to continue. If it bothers you that much then you need to take a stand on it, even if she is your mother. at the very least talk to your father and see if he'll talk to her if you don't wanna confront our mother, but you confronting her would be the best idea.

good luck.
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.......X2
 
Thanks for the input guys.But first and foremost I will tell you that you can't rationalize with my mother.There really is no meeting in the middle.As for my father my mother rules the roost and what my mother says goes and he abides to it.I guess it wouldn't be bad if I live in another town,province but she lives only three blocks away:eek:.If I could actually sit down with my mom and actually talk about it I would.It really burns me because she claims that I force the great outdoors and hunting upon my family.Then she goes and fills my daughters head with if you go hunting you are going to get shot,
the guns are really going to hurt you when you shoot them,ect.She has shot her sister's .243 in the past with no problem but now even fears the .22.Any more input would be great as you can see what I am up against.
 
7mm-08,

Sorry to hear about your situation. :( Girls at 12 are easily influanced by people. In time she will learn your mother isnt right (as she will see you and your older daughter havent been hurt while hunting and shooting so it cant be that dangerous). ;) Just keep her active in other aspects of the outdoors if she wants to be active in things like fishing and if the summer wasnt over I'd say take your family camping. :cool: If your daughters fear is related soly to the guns nothing else then work around it till she gets out of that state and do what dumbdawg said, give your daughter space to make her own mind. :)

Alittle food for the fire if you deside to talk to your daughter about how safe it is shooting and hunting compared to what your mother is telling her:

I'm 18 (19 in about a week and abit) got my PAL and Hunting licenses and own a gun, have had guns in the family (both my moms and dads sides) for generations. I dont know of any accident that has happend with a gun in my family in the last 100 years!. :cool:

Dimitri
 
Your kids your rules...what you teach them will shape their lives and even your community later. Your Mother has to respect this.

Take yer girls hunting. :)
 
i had about the same..except it was the ex that was the anti...needless to say she won..
neither of my daughters would get into shooting or hunting..
but my grandkids:D are gung ho on it:D and they have there mom,s ok on all:dancingbanana: :dancingbanana:
 
That sucks! You have too put your foot down at some point in time with your mother. No matter how stubborn your mother is, she must be told to stay out of "family matters". Your daughters mind is her own and niether your mother or you (not saying you are) should put mindless opinions in her head. You as the father can still include her in scouting/camping trips and she will see for herself what is right or wrong for her. But for the love of god, stand up to your mother. I'm sure we've all been there at some point or matter. Your the father, shes the grandmother.
 
fogducker said:
i had about the same..except it was the ex that was the anti...needless to say she won..
neither of my daughters would get into shooting or hunting..
but my grandkids:D are gung ho on it:D and they have there mom,s ok on all:dancingbanana: :dancingbanana:
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you forgot to tell people about the girls halfbrother
 
You should tell your mother that more people are killed golfing every year than are hunting :) (true) Also, have your older daughter talk to her and see what the issue is and explain to her there is no worry about saftey, she may be able to help too.
 
PUT YOUR FOOT DOWN!!!! It doesn't matter if she will "discuss it" or "meet in the middle"......Lay it down. "You WILL NOT discuss guns/hunting with my daughter, or YOU WILL suffer the consequences of not seeing her". Thats it, end of story, NOT up for discusion or rebuttal, period. Make it her choice.

Been there, done that....got the kid who hunts.
 
PUT YOUR FOOT DOWN!!!! It doesn't matter if she will "discuss it" or "meet in the middle"......Lay it down. "You WILL NOT discuss guns/hunting with my daughter, or YOU WILL suffer the consequences of not seeing her". Thats it, end of story, NOT up for discusion or rebuttal, period. Make it her choice.
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X2
It's lies about hunting and shooting at this point. What other other tangled webs of deception will she spread next?
 
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