need new references as one decided my having a gun licence was against his beliefs

themikea said:
That sucks. I wouldn't blame someone for not wanting to act as a reference, but to agree to do it and back out in the middle is pretty low. Doesn't sound like much of a friend. If I were in that situation, I would convey my disappointment with them backing out in the middle and leaving you hanging. Unless there was an apology, I would distance myself from the friendship.
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Nah, even with an apology, it's time to cut that "friend" loose. If he's burned you once, he'll burn you again
 
the rcmp are sending out new forms for a new reference so hopefully that means that he did not screw me otherwise they would just deny my licence wouldn't they
 
jinx0523 said:
not sure i am ready to throw away that long of a friendship over this and if i say anything now i a pretty sure that is what will happen i do not hold my tongue well when i am this mad.
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He f-ed you over like an a$$hole. If he was truly a friend, he wouldn't have pulled that sh!tbreak move at all. If he didn't believe in guns, he could have been honest and told you so right from the get go. I would not even talk to him if I were in your place. I tend to not want to be friends with anti-gun ignorant pricks anyway..
 
That is a crappy deal for sure. Like most others here suggested, I would not longer have anything to do with him..lifelong friend or not. Looks like he was more of an acquaintance than a friend as it turns out.
I can't even imagine someone agreeing to do that for you and then changing his mind during the interview...what kind of a #### does something like that????
Glad to hear they are just sending you a form for another reference.

Choose this one wisely you will...
 
jinx0523 said:
not sure i am ready to throw away that long of a friendship over this
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Don't! Yeah he owes you a big apology because he should have said something at the time you asked him to be a reference. But, in the grand scheme of things he is still your friend, you just have a difference of opinion. With this difference now out in the open you have a chance over time to sway his opinion. My point is, don't throw a 15 year friendship away over his one mistake. What he did sucks, but if he wasn't your friend he wouldn't have said gun licenses were against his beliefs and terminated the interview. He would have said something like "don't give him a license because I think he may do something bad..." or something to that affect. He didn't. He just stated his beliefs to the wrong person. Maybe he didn't have the courage to tell you upfront but his emotions (we all know anti-gun beliefs are always emotional) got the better of him during the interview. Now you have the chance to be the bigger man and start the process to mend the friendship and like I said before, maybe convert him to our side over time.
 
jinx0523 said:
i am the first one to defend everyones right to there own beliefs and values which is why i get so angry when other people feel the need to inpose there values on me. i mean objecting to me having a gun licence and legally obtaining a gun is like objecting to me having a drivers licence and owning a car cause you do not believe in driving
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It's not about that. It's more like he made a promise and he backed out at the worst possible time. Did he or did he not know how much more difficult he made it is besides the point. He can back out from dinner plans or even a camping trip but a character reference for a background check? That's a low worthy of loosing a friend over. I feel your frustration
 
Yep, time to let that "friendship" go. Not a single reference question asks about whether he believes in guns or not. When he agreed to be a reference it was to being a character reference for you so he had no right to just stop the interview after agreeing to you that he would be your reference.
 
At the very best he is a flake. It is against his beliefs, and he chose the worst possible time to express it? I would say that his actions were closer to sabotage than a brain fart.

On a scale of 1 to 10, 1 being him returning your lawnmower with no gas, and 10 him boning your wife, I would consider that an 11.

Alley-oop.
 
This is a person you know you can't count on.

No need to make him into an enemy, but he clearly is not your friend.
 
I used two of my wife's friends as references. One was cool about it, the other wanted to make sure I was only going to buy a "hunting" rifle or shotgun as she is all for the assault weapons ban down the states. I told her it was non-restricted, so no tactical guns really. If I ever get my restricted I guess I will have to find different references.
 
That's really quite sad. It's sad that a person would stoop to that level over a freaking gun licence.

One of my references told me straight up that he doesn't like guns. That said, he still gave me a good reference.
 
themikea said:
That sucks. I wouldn't blame someone for not wanting to act as a reference, but to agree to do it and back out in the middle is pretty low. Doesn't sound like much of a friend. If I were in that situation, I would convey my disappointment with them backing out in the middle and leaving you hanging. Unless there was an apology, I would distance myself from the friendship.
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He didn't just back out, He stabbed his friend in the back during the interview.
That's a traitor if ever there was one.
 
No friend in my opinion. I had a couple that didn't agree with guns - I showed them the door. I simply cannot be friends with people with that blatant lack of logic or reason. Someone who disagrees with our sport enough to screw you over WHILST speaking with the RCMP doesn't deserve even one more word from you. Goodbye, and good riddance, assface.
 
llO0DQLE said:
He f-ed you over like an a$$hole. If he was truly a friend, he wouldn't have pulled that sh!tbreak move at all. If he didn't believe in guns, he could have been honest and told you so right from the get go. I would not even talk to him if I were in your place. I tend to not want to be friends with anti-gun ignorant pricks anyway..
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Drift away and sever the "friendship/relationship" but do NOT make a hating enemy out of him.
He doesn't know the power he holds over you regarding "public safety concerns".
Don't give him reason to go searching for ways to screw you.
 
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