Demonical said:
BIGREDD is right, no animal ever dies with it's eyes closed. If you approach any big game animal and it's eyes are closed, then it is not dead and you better bust 'em again!!
Well me and a buddy was a sittin around
in a huntin lodge bar and aft we'd downed
a couple o' beers some loud talkin tourist
got up and proposed a bet
well he stood up and he challenged anyone there
who could hunt and kill and bring in a bear
would win all the beer that he could drink
when we heard that we got set.
we had 98 bucks between us, no fear
we had 8 bucks for food and 90 for beer
loaded our guns and our ammunition
lock stock barrel and butt
in the back of a car of unknown year with 3 bald tires and no first gear
in a rusted busted automobile with a monkey wrench for a steering wheel
and both front doors, jammed and rusted, permanently shut.
that weekend we shot some no trespassing signs
the glass insulators off telephone lines and any number of bottles and cans...
let me see also we knocked
ummm 14 sheep, 3 cows, 6 frogs
we winged 4 hunters and we wounded their dogs... never even saw a bear
mostly cuz we were half drunk..
so we started home from our half baked trip, half hearted half blind, half cut
in the back of a car of unknown year with 3 bald tires and no first gear
in a rusted busted automobile with a monkey wrench for a steering wheel
and both front doors, jammed and rusted, permanently shut.
i was drivin home after all that drinkin
by this time we were completely stinkin, so i just didn't see that hairy form that bounded in front of our wheels
until too late, i honked n' steered, slammed on the brakes
pumped and veered with screaming brake linings and
ballbearing whinings and ear splitting burning tire squeals
couldn't help it, it wasn't my fault
but i'm no hit and runner so i came to a halt. we climbed out the back door uneasy and queasy to see what it was that we'd struck
well large as life, but dead lyin there stretched out on the road was a full grown bear
my friend and i looked at each other and smiled, we couldnt believe our luck... so we loaded him into the back of the car all hide, hair and gut
in the back of a car of unknown year with 3 bald tires and no first gear
in a rusted busted automobile with a monkey wrench for a steering wheel
and both front doors, jammed and rusted, permanently shut.
back on the highway we started singing a song
we werent singin for very long
when i noticed a peculiar 3rd bass voice joinin in slightly off key
i was seein double but i'd never heard of hearin double and then it occurred
a hairy scary incredible theory, somethin that just couldn't be
as though to confirm that it wasn't a joke
the bear who had only been stunned, awoke
with a glare and a stare and a growl and a scowl like a rampant bull rhino in heat
in the back of a car of unknown year with 3 bald tires and no first gear
in a rusted busted automobile with a monkey wrench for a steering wheel
and both front doors, jammed and rusted, permanently shut
Well here in the hospital things are quiet.
If it wasn't too painful to cry then i'd try it
but most days i sit here an listen to me buddy
moan in the opposite bed
wasnt what u think though
it wasn't the bear who caused
all this physical wear n'tear
it was that no good monkey wrench
spun off the drivin shaft, i
thought we were all dead
i know what ur thinking, as for the bear
he's 3 beds over, you can hear him swear
moanin n' groanin, complainin and a painin bout
wantin to get home but
not in a car of unknown year with 3 bald tires and no first gear
in a rusted busted automobile with a monkey wrench for a steering wheel
and both front doors, jammed and rusted, permanently shut.
-Buddy Wasisname & The Other Fellers
