"...do you feel that..." It's got more to do with how well a particular pitsol fits your hand. The chances of one pistol fitting both of you aren't high. However, for an inexpensive .22 that likely will fit you both, look into a Ruger.
I am afraid that 9mm has more muzzle jump than .40 which you won't enjoy much. A .357 revolver allow you shoot .38spl and it is a very enjoyable round to boot. very little kick
Trigun.
...Blackhawk?
I had NO idea 9mm's have more muzzle jump! I figured the lower the calibre the easier to manage. We used to shoot .22's but I think they're too low powered now and we wan't something a little more exciting.
What about the Ruger New Model??



























